Dear person who was out walking their dog past my house:

You've made me angry. Very, very angry. But I'm going to be as nice and as civil as I can about what you did and how inconsiderate, and discourteous you are.

Trash pickup in my town is on Thursdays, so every Wednesday we roll two trash cans out to the curb. One is blue for recycling and the other is just a regular tall, black trash can with a lid. We do this rather than put our trash bags on the ground to get wet or have animals trying to find a snack in there. Trash In the trash cans with the lids closed, keeps things dry, away from the animals, and easy for the trash pickup guys to just roll over and empty it. Here's what it looks like.

Jeff Parsons - Townsquare Media
Jeff Parsons - Townsquare Media
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Does it look familiar to you? It should.

This is the trashcan that was sitting out at the curb that you decided to put a plastic bag containing your dog's poop into. Guess what trash pickup doesn't collect. Dog s---!

So big deal you're thinking right? That's what a trash can is for right? Wrong! That's what YOUR trash can is for. This isn't a public trash can. Keep your dog s--- out of mine.

You may still be wondering why this bothers me so much. Allow me to show you what happens in just one day with a trash can that has just one tiny plastic bag of dog poop in it.

WARNING! For those of you who are reading this that did not put this bag of poop in my trashcan, if you are squeamish, you might want to scroll quickly past this next photo. If you are the one who did put it in my trash can. Take a long look at what you are about to see.

 

Ready?

 

 

Jeff Parsons - Townsquare Media.
Jeff Parsons - Townsquare Media.
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That's not rice. It's a still picture, so you can't see it move. Those are maggots and that's just a small portion of them that in the course of 36 hours burst from the dog poop after a fly laid its eggs in their favorite place to lay eggs, animal poop.

In the four years that I have lived here, I have never once seen a maggot in my trash until you decided you were too lazy to carry your dog's poop home with you to dispose of it yourself.

At least you got step one right. You bagged up your dog's poop so it wasn't left on someone's lawn. Step two is to take it home with you and dispose of it yourself. Don't leave the mess for me.

Was that calm enough? I don't know. I think I could have ramped it up a bit more.

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